Before the wedding, most brides are given a bridal shower.  Some of my best memories are of the games played at my bridal showers.  

One that was played at mine, and is still an all time favorite - the toilet paper wedding dress.  Divide the guests into teams and give each team one roll of toilet paper.  Each team chooses a model and then uses the toilet paper to fashion a wedding dress and ensemble.  The bride gets to choose the best team.  

Another fun game that also involves the guests is the pocketbook game.  Assign points for common items women carry in their purse - lipstick/gloss, tissues, keys, tampons, or makeup.  Keys might be 1 point and lipstick 2 points.  But, also include points for random items such as a can opener or kids toys.  

For a game that really involves the bride, play the blindfold game.  Blindfold the bride and then tell her to get dressed.  Give her a bag of clothing items as well as fun accessories such as hats, glasses or scarves.  

These games can be great opportunities for photos so be sure someone brings a camera.  

Although religious ceremonies are at an all time low, accounting for just under a third* of all weddings, to many people they are as important as ever.
With couples in inter-faith marriages combining aspects of each other’s beliefs and cultures in their wedding, ceremonies are becoming more and more unique.

Choosing which traditions to use in your wedding ceremony can be difficult as there are so many elements to consider, all of which make for a richer wedding experience.

Kiddushin:
A Jewish marriage is seen as total dedication of the bride and groom to each other. One of the most symbolic aspects of a Jewish marriage is the Seven Circles that take place under the Chuppah. The Chuppah is a covering on four poles which symbolises the bride and groom’s new home that, like Sarah and Abraham’s tent, is open to guests. The groom awaits the bride inside and as she enters, she circles the groom seven times. This symbolises the seven days of Creation and the ‘new world’ the newlyweds are about to create with each other.

Nikah:
The Prophet Muhammad believed simple weddings were the best kind and often Islamic weddings are not extravagant displays of wealth. Following the marriage contract or Aqd-Nikah, there is a celebratory banquet known as a Walima for friends, relatives and neighbours. One lovely tradition is the mahr, the wedding gift from a groom to his bride. This is usually a sum of money which is hers to do with as she wishes, allowing her to be financially independent from her husband.

Vivah Sanskar:
A Hindu marriage represents the start of a couple’s journey together and involves many rituals and traditions. A favoured tradition involves the lighting of a sacred fire and offering a sacrifice of rice to it. The bride and groom then walk around the fire four times, to symbolise life’s four goals: Dharma -religious and moral duties; Artha - prosperity; Kama - earthly pleasures; Moksha - spiritual salvation and liberation.

Tying the knot:
A hand fasting ceremony is an ancient Nordic ritual to celebrate the joining of hands. Today it is used in humanist and civil weddings to mark the union of marriage. The bride and groom clasp hands and coloured ribbons are threaded around and through their hands. If done correctly, when the hands are parted a knot should remain. The colours of the ribbons symbolise different qualities admired by the couple, such as green for fertility and pink for happiness.

Buddhist:
Although a Buddhist wedding is more a social than a religious occasion, the ceremony can be presided over by a monk. Vows vary depending on the couple, but are usually adapted from the Sigalovada Sutta, and said in front of a shrine with an image of Buddha, candles and flowers. In some countries the bride will change outfit several times to show her family’s wealth and an older married couple will often await the newlyweds in the bedroom for good luck.
*Reference


Whether you’re having a religious wedding or a civil ceremony, you’ll want to be sure that your special day is protected. By taking out Wedding Insurance, you’ll be covered if something doesn’t quite go to plan.
John Lewis Wedding Insurance is available for weddings in the UK and abroad so if you are planning on having a Buddhist ceremony in Bali or a Catholic wedding in Canterbury you’ll be covered. 

In my last post, I talked about DIY resources in brick and mortar stores.  Today,  I want to talk about online resources.  While some of the stores had an online shopping option, there are many other great resources for DIY project supplies.

Wholesale Floral:

Wholesale Floral offer large selection of floral and craft supplies.  They have vases and containers, small lighting, as well as silk flowers and floral supplies.  You can also order fresh flowers directly through them.   They carry craft supplies such as glue, ribbon, moss and more.  Read more about DIY centerpieces


Save on Crafts:

Save on Crafts offers excellent prices on crafts supplies and party decor.  You can find everything from cake stands to chalkboards to candle trees and so much more.  They carry decor that I haven't seen in many other places such as birch bark covered vases.  This is truly a DIY brides best friend.


Wedding Warehouse

This online store is no so much for DIY projects but for wedding supplies.  This is your resource for favors, napkins, water or wine labels or place card holders.  You can order everything from personalized stickers to photo booth backdrops.  Need a sign?  This is the place to find it.


Happy Shopping!

Creating a wedding budget and sticking to it is one of the most important things to do early in the wedding planning process.  Setting an overall budget and then allocating amounts toward each vendor category will help you be in control of your expenses.  Knowing how much you can spend in each category also helps you choose vendors that are in your price point.

Here is what a typical wedding breakdown looks like.  This budget doesn't include an amount for miscellaneous expenses, which will occur.  

For each bride, the amount that they budget for each category will depend upon their preferences and what is most important to them.   You may choose to save in one area and splurge in another.

Kristen and Lance were the sweetest couple.  They are also incredibly photogenic.  Here are some sneak peaks from their engagement and bridal sessions.

Bridal Portraits - AJ Holmes Photography at Natchez Hills Vineyard

Engagement Session - Visions by Valeisha

Kari and Blake were married in Franklin, TN   Kari wanted a 1940 vintage inspired wedding with lots of fun details.

The bride wore a beautiful dress with a birdcage veil and fabulous red shoes.

Centerpieces were vases of apples, lanterns and gourds with candy apple favors for every guest. The head table was large white lanterns and beautiful vintage plates. The rich brown and green color scheme complemented this fall wedding.

During the cocktail hour, guests were served apple cider and caramel popcorn.

 In addition to the amazing bride's cake there was strawberry shortcake for a groom's cake.  Later in the evening there were also cookies and plain and chocolate milk served in vintage glass milk bottles.     

The couple made their getaway from the church in a vintage 1941 GMC truck.  

This couple had so much fun their entire day.

Photography:  

Magnify U

Flowers: Co-worker of the bride

Ceremony: Owens Chapel

Reception:

 Journey Church

DJ:

Spring Hill Formals

http://www.springhillformals.com/dj.htm

Transportation:

Grand Avenue Limo

Cake:

Dulce Desserts

In days gone by wedding cakes were very symbolic. Nowadays they are mostly decorative and there to tantalise the taste buds of the guests and bridal party. However, in some cultures the symbolism of the wedding cakes is still as strong as ever.  In China brides have a huge layered cake which is known as lapis Surabaya. The layers are said to symbolise a success ladder for the happy couple. They cut the bottom layer first and feed the slices to their in-laws. In the Caribbean guests pay to look at the wedding cake which is concealed under a piece of cloth. Foliage is placed on top of the cake as a symbol of the continued growth of love between the newlyweds. In Norway the cake is more like bread and in Iceland it is a collection of pastries. The cutting of the wedding cake is one of the first tasks that the bride and groom undertake together as a married couple. It is hoped that the unity that they share in that moment will continue throughout their life together! For more check out our infographic!

Vicky works alonsgide Fiona Cairns Wedding Cakes. For her wedding she had a three tiered wedding cake decorated with purple ribbon and a lovely sprig of flowers! She loves to write wedding themed articles.

When planning her wedding, most brides think of the dress, the cake, the details and how much fun it will be.  They rarely think of what happens if something goes wrong.

Truthfully, no wedding ever goes exactly as planned, but most of these are little issues that are easily fixed such as a boutonniere needing repaired or the flowergirl not wanting to walk down the aisle.  These are things that only you and the wedding planner will notice.  Sometimes there are more obvious problems such as a circuit breaker flips or a light bulb goes out.  Usually the venue or vendors can fix these problems.

Then, there are the truly big problems, a vendor goes out of business or doesn't show up, extreme weather shuts down the venue, or unexpected illness.  Sometimes vendors make mistakes; they are human.  Other things are completely out of our control.

If you are unhappy with something at your wedding, talk to the right vendor.  Complaining to the wedding planner about the cake won't fix the problem. While a wedding planner helps to direct and facilitate your wedding day, we are not responsible for the services and actions of the other vendors. Decide if a product or service that maybe cost $500 is worth the aggravation and potential lawyer fees to remedy it. If you are unhappy with a vendor, talk to them. Ask them what they can do to make it better; it may not be your preferred solution but it might be an acceptable alternative. Decide how important this really is in the big picture of the wedding.

Ways to avoid being unhappy with vendors:

1. Talk to your wedding planner.  While your planner may not have worked with every vendor in your city, they are usually connected to a network of wedding professionals who can give unbiased opinions about vendors.

2. Look for reviews online.  Common places are bbb.org, Wedding Wire  and Yelp.com.  Just remember that not every review is legitimate; sometimes brides have unrealistic expectations which will impact their feelings about a vendor.

3. Get a written contract from every vendor that includes signatures and information about cancellations and payments.

4. Purchase wedding insurance from a company such as WedSafe . This can include liability due to alcohol and cover you for missing vendors.

Life requires flexibility. Remember the important things is to celebrate your special day together and that the majority of weddings occur with very few issues.

There are hundreds, actually thousands of amazing wedding professionals around the Middle TN and North AL area.  Each one of these vendors can provide you with the services and products that you need to make your day special.   But I think it is very important for you to find vendors that fit your personality and style.  Usually this is a decision that can be made after the consultation meeting.  But sometimes it takes longer.

I had a bride and groom meet with me and then book my services for their wedding almost a year before the actual date.  A little time goes by and then I get an email stating that she doesn't want my services and wants to use a friend.

OK.....

From a business side I was a little upset since I knew that the odds were slim of me booking another wedding that same date on short notice.  But I parted on good terms with the bride.  A few more months go by and I happen to see that same bride's wedding on a wedding blog.  In the article she describes parting company with me and then hiring another local wedding planner.  You know what...I was kinda hurt.  But then I stepped back and looked at the bigger picture.  I realized that it was for the best that the bride left me and went with another planner.  When she was first planning, she just wanted to check a box off her to-do list and didn't take the time to decide if I was the right planner for her and her wedding.

Sometimes when emailing or chatting with a bride I realize that this isn't the right bride for me; she has needs that I can't meet or we just aren't a good fit.   When choosing a planner, it isn't always about budget or style or communication; you have to like them as a person and have a gut feeling that they are the right one.  You don't want to add to your stress by changing wedding planners.

When you are meeting with a wedding planner, make sure that they not only match the services and budget that you need, but also that they are a good fit.

First ask the business related questions:
Are they a legitimate business? Licensed? Insured?
How long have they been in business?  (Remember certified does not mean experienced)
Are they part of the a wedding group or network?
Can you view some of their previous weddings and testimonials?
More questions to ask a potential planner

These next questions are ones to ask yourself during or after the meeting:
Do they make you feel relaxed?
Do they understand the style of your wedding?
Are you comfortable being around them for hours at a time?
Did they listen to your ideas?
Can you tell them all the family issues around the wedding and not feel like you have to withhold information?
Do they try to sell you on bigger packages or more expensive vendors?  Do they respect your budget?

These are just a few of the questions to ask yourself after your consultation meeting with a planner.  Everyone is unique. It is important to find a planner whose personality complements yours to make your day stress free and blissful.

This  beautiful outdoor fall wedding was a gathering of friends and family to celebrate the love of this couple.

The bride wanted the event to be fresh and natural, much like the venue which consisted of an old log cabin, barn and tents set up for the event.  The venue was surrounded by woods, fields and a creek all creating the secluded and natural feel the bride desired.  The bridal party stayed overnight in the cabin the evening before the wedding sharing laughter and friendship.

Many of the vendors were friends or co-workers of the bride.  The ceremony musicians brought guitars and drums and played hymns and old religious songs. The groom made all of the chalkboard signs. The florist came onsite the day of the wedding and decorated using flowers she brought as well as florals and stems from the nearby field.  The boutonnieres were succulents or wild stems and berries.

Isn't this plaid tie perfect with the succulent. 

The cake was decorated with roses, succulents, and rosemary and herbs from the bride.  It was multiple single tier cakes placed on an antique cake stand.

This wedding was filled with simplicity that highlighted the incredible love this couple shows for each other.

Photographer: 

Lauren Owens Photography

Event Planner: 

Events by Elaine

Venue: 

Hachland Hill

Flowers: FIORI - 

615-838-8381

Hair Stylist: Elise Harding (friend of bride)

Cake: Hannah Lehrer (friend of bride)

If you search the internet for tips to help you negotiate with vendors, you will find lots of articles and advice.  Some of it is good, some OK and some ridiculous.  

This article from The Knot suggests that you "Try your hand negotiating at a flea market to see what talking style works for you."  Sorry, but wedding professionals are not flea market vendors; we don't haggle. 

Telling a vendor what another competitor charges isn't a great tactic.  Here's why....What I charge for wedding planning isn't the same as what another planner charges.  They offer different options and services.  You aren't comparing apples to apples.  You may pay less only to find out that the other vendor had better service or better tasting food...something that is hard to put a price on. 

The advice to be indifferent and prepared to walk away, that works at flea markets not for wedding professionals.  You might miss booking your dream photographer who only takes one wedding that date.  Would you negotiate with the plumber coming to fix your broken pipes that are spilling water across your floors? 

Don't lie to service vendors and call your wedding a "big family reunion."  The tools and supplies that are customarily included at a wedding wouldn't even be packed if you call it a party.  You could be missing out on services that would have been included - wasting you money in the long run. 

Good Negotiating Tips 

It is completely acceptable to tell a vendor your budget, in fact we prefer to know your budget up front.  If a quote comes in higher than you can afford, talk to the vendor.  We can usually come up with really creative ways to meet your budget.  Flowers too high? Ask the florist to suggest cheaper alternatives, such as flowers that are in season or cheaper per stem for the centerpieces and save the best for the brides bouquet.  

If you can be flexible with your date, such as an off-season or a Friday or Monday, you can get great discounts on venues.  Look for ways to simplify which will save you money.  Do you need both programs and fans?  That is easily $200+ out of your budget.   

Be reasonable about your budget and what you can accomplish with it.

Note sure where to start with creating a gift bag insert?  We have 2 free templates to get you started. Download it in the Resource Library.

It is set up as a tri-fold brochure or a vertical rack style and both are pre-filled with local information such as restaurants or things to do around downtown Nashville.  But everything can be customized to fit your wedding and style.  Enjoy!

(here is a sample that a bride sent me to show how easy it was)

If some of your guest are from out of town, one of the best ways to welcome your guests is to have a gift basket or bag sent to their hotel room.  This basket could have a note from the couple thanking them for sharing in the celebration.  If possible create a small brochure filled with dates, times and locations for the wedding weekend as well as contact information.  Out of town guests may appreciate knowing which restaurants your recommend or what are some fun places to visit.  Everything can be packaged in a simple kraft bag or you could choose a nicer canvas bag, bucket or box to match the colors and theme or your wedding. It can also be a nice touch to include items local to your area.

Ideas for Nashville include:

• Map of the city

• Guest book with tourist attractions

• Food samples made locally - Tennessee tea cakes, Goo-goo clusters, Lynchburg candy, Moon pies, RC Cola, small bottle of Jack Daniels, Loveless jams or baking goods, Yazoo beer, or barbecue sauce from one of numerous local resources.

• Postcards - Ranging from Hatch Show Print designs to vintage reprints to typical kitsch

• Notecards - e.g. Belle Meade Plantation, Hermitage Hotel, Nashville skyline, etc

• Local cookbook

• Maps of historic areas such as Civil Wars trails or Country Music stars homes.

• Souvenirs - Guitar picks or record label pins are just 2 of the small items that can be found.

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Free Download - Gift Bag Insert brochure for Nashville area.

In Victorian times, communicating through flowers allowed individuals to express feelings.  These were commonly used in Tussie-Mussies, small bouquets of mixed flowers.  .  Some of the meanings might surprise brides who now choose flowers based on colors or appearance instead of meaning.

Belles Fleurs

Baby's breath - innocence
Bells of Ireland - luck
Cabbage - Profit
Calla Lilly - modesty
Carnation, Red - deep love
Carnation, Striped - refusal
Chrysanthemum - truth
Daisy - gentleness
Dahlia - elegance
Dandelion - flirting
Forget-me-nots - true love
Gardenia - ecstasy
Hydrangea - heartlessness
Iris - good news or message
Lily - purity
Lily of the Valley - return of happiness
Orchid - refined beauty
Peony - shame or bashful
Ranunculus - radiant with charm
Rose, Pink - grace
Rose, Red  - everlasting love
Sunflower - lofty thoughts
Tulip - declaration of love

Import flowers

These are just a few of the common flowers and their meanings.  Find more flower meanings.  Next time you select flowers for a bouquet whether for a wedding or just your table at home, think about their meaning and the message you are sending to others.

You see this mentioned on every planning site, in every magazine and every community of brides....Get everything in writing!

But, somehow that message doesn't seem to make it to every bride.  The wedding day arrives and the flowers are delivered and the bride is surprised when there are tiny yellow flowers in her centerpieces.  She hates yellow...however, she never put that in writing in the contract with the florist or even put it in an email.  The florist doesn't know that the bride hates yellow and so has to make changes onsite, or the venue manager or wedding planner has to remove the offending yellow stems.

It you absolutely want something a certain way, shape, size, color, etc, then put in writing with that vendor.  The same goes if you detest a song, flavor, or color.  Wedding vendors do their best to provide you an amazing day, but they aren't psychic.  So many misunderstandings can be avoided by giving specific lists or descriptions to your vendors.  

Now that we have worked on some of the overall details and the ceremony; it is time to focus on the reception.  The reception takes both the largest amount of time the day of your wedding as well as the largest amount of money.

We already looked at picking the overall feel for your wedding.  Thinking about that decision, picture your reception location.

• Hotel - Modern
• Hotel - Historic
• Banquet hall
• Private Home/ Backyard
• Tented/Outdoors
• Country club
• Barn/Rustic
• Historic venue/Plantation
• Offbeat venue - art gallery, museum, etc

Food plays an important part of the reception.  Not just what is served but how the food is served impacts your wedding. Which style fits your wedding?

• Heavy appetizers
• Full buffet
• Served sit down meal
• Food stations
• Casual buffet/picnic

• Smaller vases of flowers with votives
• Centerpieces that are large and detailed
• Unique centerpieces that are personal to you and the groom - stacks of books, travel landmarks, etc
• Tables have alternating but balancing centerpieces
• Details on guest and favor table that complement the wedding theme
• Lighting around the room